March Book Report: Excellent Women

One of the nice things about being me is that I always have a steady supply of books to read.  On my desk are two generous stacks of new books to be read.  I’ve an entire bookshelf (floor to ceiling with six long shelves available) of books I’ve read and loved and will happily read again.  I’m not likely to fall short if, say a pandemic strikes and I can’t leave the house.  

Ahem.

These days, that’s a very handy trait.  I’m reading a lot here in my locked down world and the end of March featured a great re-read: Barbara Pym’s Excellent Women.  Set in 1950s London and told from the point of view of Mildred, herself an “excellent woman” the book is an engaging observation of human nature.  The phrase “excellent women” is British and refers to unmarried gentlewomen of a certain age.  Women like Mildred abounded in British society in the 20th century, when more women than usual were unmarried thanks to a shortage of marriageable men generated by the World Wars of the period.

Mildred is unmarried and in her mid 30s, the daughter of a now-deceased vicar.  She lives happily alone in London and is just as happily a self-declared spinster.  She tells a story that is honest and offers a pointed commentary on her world, rather in the tone of a Jane Austen narrator.  This is delightful and just my sort of read.  As is the case in some of my favorite English novels, the arc of the story is focused on the seemingly hum drum nature of daily life.  In the moments, nothing magnificent occurs.  But lives, meaningful ones, are lived.  And I always find that it is the small moments that make a rich life.  This book was a re-read and a good one for a time period when current events were anxiety producing.  I read it with a cozy blanket and a cat on my lap, one of the small daily moments of my life that makes for much satisfaction and happiness.

Remote Learning is Live

Spring Break  - the oddest Spring Break of my life - is over.  Classes resumed today and so this morning I got up, had a shower, and came downstairs to work.  Armed with a cup of coffee, I set to teaching remotely from my study.  My classroom is now in a basket.

I’d spent a part of every day for the last two weeks making plans for this kind of teaching and learning and while I started the day with some nervousness, class went well.  At our next class meeting we will practice a teleconference.  Normally, in class my hands and mind are busy with kids.  That’s also my focus in remote class, though it feels substantially different.  I’ve been teaching so long that trying these new learning muscles is an interesting phenomenon.    For a while, there will be no teaching on auto pilot.  These days, that's a good thing ----- days with a purpose beyond worrying about things that I cannot control is rather a good feeling.

Report from the Home Front: Routines and Grace edition

T has been working from home for several years and that gave me a leg up on identifying strategies that will work for me as I begin teaching from home next week.  

Last week, I planned to take a break from schoolwork and so I spent time in pajamas on the sofa.  Pretty quickly, I learned that all-day- pajamas and Twitter was a recipe for personal disaster.  By the time T emerged from her office for lunch, I was a nervous wreck.  It wasn’t the alone-time that got me; it was the pace of alarming news.  A need to be cheerful for JT meant that T got all my worries, in one giant bucket-load.

Not cool.  Also, not useful.  And honestly no surprise….I am a creature of habits.  If I have a middle school mantra, it’s this:  The only thing you can control is yourself.  So I took a page from that playbook and got my crap together.

Twitter and pandemic news is now regulated.

NPR and twice-a-day NYT are fine.  TV news and the Cheetoh-in-chief daily media shitstorm are out.  

Leisurely mornings are fine (for now).  But I need to shower and put on clothes for the day, even if I never leave the house.  And I need a plan and a variety of activities.  Reading, writing, time in the garden, checking in on my parents via phone, stretches, school work, organizing things in the study for my school work, watching TV, house chores, getting supper on the table…..there is time for all of it.  This kind of variety adds to my day and eases my anxiety.

And so I am moving forward in this new landscape with routines and a plan to help shape my days.  I am controlling what I can control, taking care of my people and my self, and wishing every day to summon the grace necessary to get through this.

One day at a time, y’all.

Front Porch in March

March didn’t come in like a lion around here.  It was sunny and breezy and cold, but that’s not much of a roaring lion.  Though it’s been a mild Winter, I am ready for the sunlight and warmth and on the first I headed straight out to the porch to welcome the coming Spring.  The front door has my Easter wreath.  It’s probably a tad early but I make the porch decorating rules around here so the Easter wreath is a go.  

And it an Easter wreath has made its appearance, a bunny flag is also in order.

The table has pastels and greenery to go with my goofy tin lamb.  There are fairy lights and flowers to welcome in the longer days.

Though March is shaping up to be one hell of a month (seriously, a pandemic, what the fuck?), the porch offers hope about brighter days to come.  

Report from the Front: Together edition

T and I went to my school office this morning to collect my plants and bring home a few more supplies for remote learning.  In the sunlight, Spring is picking up pace and the trees and plants are clearly getting ready to pop.  It was quiet and traffic was light.  But while we were stopped at a light on the way home, we saw a pickup truck with a bumper sticker that read:

America!

F&*k Yeah!

I looked at that arrogant boast and all I could think was that we were once a nation who prided itself on helping to save the world from the Nazis.  And now, a few generations from that courage and leadership, we are awash in foolish America First ignorance.

The only way through these frightening days is together: as families, as neighborhoods, as communities, as states, as Americans, as continents, as the world.  

Together.  

Report from the Home Front: Hope and Love edition

A week into Spring Break, a week I have spent safely at home working on school materials and trying to relax, it feels like time is working in a whole new way.  On the one hand, the days are strangely similar.  On the other, nothing feels the same.

T and I had tickets to see the Indigo Girls live this coming Saturday.  The concert was postponed and instead we watched them live on-line last night.  They played and answered questions and at one point more than 60k people were watching.  It felt like a community of the hopeful and with the music still whirling about my head, I am grateful for the break in anxiety.

When I feel my fear mounting, I count my blessings and I am grateful that I have work to which I can attend.  And then I limit the amount of news that I read or listen to and pick up a book.  I don’t need any more panic in my landscape.

I’ve done most of the work to turn my craft table into a desk for me to manage remote learning when school resumes on March 30.  I’ve made lesson plans to get things up and running.  I've made supper for my family each night and we've eaten together, which is very nice.  Next week, I’ll practice the remote learning lessons in earnest, getting my videos, digital assignments, and screencasts together.  So far, those activities and chirping birds has helped to sooth my jangled nerves.  In times like this, that feels like enough.

Hope y’all are well and taking time to tell your people you love them.       

Spring Brings Hope

My school began Spring Break early, at the end of the day on March 12, and from then on I was systematically involved in the preparations that would enable me and my fellow middle school teachers to instruct from home.  I’ll write much more on that process in the coming days because I want to make a record of all of it.  As I get those thoughts together, I will post them here.  Today’s post is really about me and my adjustment to this new landscape of life at home.  

T has always worked from home but now that JT and I are also here, things are different and we’re all trying to adjust.  Here on day 6 of the stay-at-home regime, I have realized that I need a plan for my days.  After a day or two of lying about in my pajamas, I realized that I need to plan my activities, lest I give in to the abyss of despair that is Covid-19 Twitter.    

Today, the first day of Spring, I took a stroll through the yard to celebrate the change that is well underway.  I found some crocus flowers from bulbs I forgot that I had planted.

Daffodils are up and flowers are close at hand.  

This patch of tulips is well on their way to a pretty celebration of Spring.

The rhododendron is readied for May blooms.

Each morning there are birds chirping their daily wake up call.  It's the first thing I hear when I wake up.

Spring always feels like hope on the horizon.  In the midst of this crisis, it is a comfort to see Mother Nature steering a path of certainty.  

News from the Inside

I can’t be the only person in the universe who feels like days are incredibly slow even while they are filled with big events.  Last week - the last week of classes before our two week Spring Break - was a literal whirlwind.  I started the week hopeful that the COVID-19 madness would slow and arrived at Wednesday utterly convinced that it would not.  On Thursday at 2:15, my school made the decision to close early for Spring Break.  By Friday, it was clear that our March 30 return to Spring Break would be via remote learning.  I stayed late at school that afternoon, packing up everything I would need to teach my 7th grade history classes from home for the rest of the year.

On Wednesday, JT learned he would be in an extended dance mix Spring Break and he and I made plans via phone for him to bring everything he could back home.  Here at home, T, who fixes computers remotely, was herself enmeshed in some very long days.

I avoid the panic-stricken news and instead listen to NPR and read the New York Times and Vox, so that I am not overwhelmed with anxiety.  Because, really, this is an anxiety-producing landscape.  Each day, I make a plan to find at least one thing for which be grateful.  My family, always, of course.  And then something else…..a daffodil in the garden, the sound of my son’s laughter, the way that T makes me laugh.

We can do this y’all, one day at a time if necessary.  As we say in New Jersey, take care.

Your Weekly Amaryllis - Week 10

This week, as we careen toward Spring Break with growing fear about the COVID 19 pandemic, the bonus bloom delivered.

Four big flowers showed their face.  The bonus bloom has been most lovely to behold especially now, as everyone is so worried about our collective health.

That’s happy!

Your Weekly Amaryllis: Week 9

The bonus flower is looking quite promising and given the sunlight forecast in the next week, I expect a bloom will show soon.

This week has already been a full assortment of chaos, though it it only Wednesday.  Since last week, we’ve been without a shower thanks to a necessary home improvement project (more on that later).  For now, I am appreciating the way this little stem brightens my day.  

Sassafras Spring

Having obsessively refreshed the weather forecast every day for the last two weeks, I am well-aware that today’s forecast calls for temperatures approaching 60 degrees.  I am giddy at the prospect and over the (cold and windy) weekend, I declared Spring.  Sassafras Spring.  Winter clothes, shoes, scarves, and coats were packed away and replaced by cheerful Spring clothing.

In the event that a blizzard turns up, I can find my snow boots.  But short of that, my pride and sneakers will have to keep me warm.

Front Yard Flowerbed in March

The daffodils peaking through the soil on the first of February are feeling less tentative at the start of March.  It may still be Winter officially, but Spring is certainly in the air.  

Tulips have joined the party.

The coming week promises temperatures in the 50s and 60s, just the sort of warmth to jumpstart some Spring blooms.  Home projects, evening school events, and car shopping rather consumed my February so I’ve reserved a Spring Break day for cleanup of this bed.  It needs it and I am ready to get my hands in the dirt.

I am excited to have Spring on the horizon and even some cold days in March cannot dim my pleasure in the coming season!