All Y'all

The other day, fed up with the phrase "you guys" I tweeted that the next time I hear that phrase I'm going to throw a punch.  I think we all know that's not much of a threat.  But in a world in which young female college graduates earn an average of $47,000 a year while young male college graduates average a shade over $59,000, I'm not inclined to ignore the passive preference for men.

On the east coast, I've been assured that "you guys" is gender neutral and inclusive.  I'm not buying it.  For one thing, guys isn't gender neutral, no matter how much the user wishes it so.  For another, there are plenty of non-gendered choices available.  Instead of starting your e-mail to men and women with the phrase "hi guys" how about "hi folks"?  I've a (male) colleague who always uses the phrase "friends" (a la FDR).  I like both of those very much.  I use y'all, and it works quite nicely.  The point is that there are options and those of us who spend time in the company of young people, setting examples of how to treat people, should explore them.

In my government classes, I don't refer to Congressmen or committee chairmen.  I reference members of Congress and committee chairs.  I'm the mother of son whom I've raised to believe that men and women should be treated equally.  He's a guy who watches women sports, who says y'all, who wouldn't dream of believing that he is better because he's a boy.  

In the meantime, I will wage my quiet war against "you guys" and Internet, I'd like y'all to help me out.

On Wisdom

On Monday, after enduring five years of discomfort, I finally made the jump and consented to having my last wisdom tooth removed.  The first two and I had parted ways when I was 10 years old in a procedure that featured the removal of 7 other teeth (yes, for a total of 9) and left me forever reluctant to see a dentist, let alone a dental surgeon, again.

I lost wisdom tooth number 3 in 2001 when I was living in Nebraska.  Other than the fact that I drove myself home after the procedure, I don't have any memories of the removal.  On Monday the last tooth and I finally parted ways.  It had been aching for years and I had delayed removal based on the ill-advised theory that the pain you know is worse than the pain you don't.  The impetus to finally have the tooth extracted was the on-going discomfort it caused and the fact that it was a hulking behemoth of a tooth intent on destroying other teeth in the neighborhood……not a good arrangement, my dentist assured me.

Though I knew it had to go, I was terrified.  No one likes dental surgery - least of all me - and in my case fear of the surgery was compounded by the fact that the procedure would require me to be down for the count, however temporary.  I've an irrational fear of being temporarily disabled, a fear magnified when I became a single mama.  I know that I can ask others for help, and I sometimes do, but I much prefer a world in which I am functioning.

Enter T, whose presence in my life persuaded me that being temporarily out of commission wasn't a disaster.  She drove me to the surgery (ignoring my appeals that we instead go shopping at the Tractor Supply Store), carried me home afterward, and served me the soft and bland cuisine the newly wisdom-toothless are permitted to enjoy.  In short, she made a difficult procedure utterly endurable, allowing me to face my fears and laugh at myself in the process.

That's a tall order.  Out of the experience, I've learned a few more lessons in pursuit of the age-old wisdom that a burden shared is a burden halved.  I've been reminded of the power of laughter and sympathy and why it is that two is more powerful than one.  The tooth is gone.  And better yet, I gained a lot in the process.

Real Life Conversations with JT: California Dreamin' edition

The backstory:  When we visit our California relations, JT and I avail ourselves of their fancy ice and water dispensing refrigerators.  We didn't have one of our own in New Jersey, so at home we made ice cubes by hand.  JT was always impressed by the automatic ice lifestyle and he longed for a share of the action, but he was convinced that such luxuries were only available in California, as was revealed when he came home from a visit to a friend's house last summer.

JT:  At X's house, their fridge makes cold water and ice, like in California.

Mama:  Oh yeah?  That's nice. 

JT:  How do you think they can do that in New Jersey?  Do you think they once lived in California?

Mama:  They must have a fridge from California.

JT:  They must. I wish that we could get a fridge from California.

Mama:  Maybe someday, honey.

As it turns out, some Californians bought us a fridge for my birthday and Christmas (thanks, Mom and Dad!) and now we're making ice cubes and cold water like those fancy left coasters.  Come on over for iced drinks at our house, Internet.

Real Life Conversations with T: Marketing edition

The backstory: I was trying to find a corporate web site for a corn dog company who used to sell corn dogs in the midwest, and T had some thoughts on the matter.

Me:  Well, it looks like they don't have much of a media presence.

T:  It's corn dogs, honey, they sell themselves.

She has a point.

Dogwood Monday: Week 5

Cold evenings and mornings seem to have arrived to stay; I've even broken down and turned on the furnace.  Pesky is busy getting ready for winter and enjoying the fall weather.  The dogwood tree's leaves have turned completely as of this week, though many remain on the branches.

If memory serves, the rest of these leaves will fall down by the end of the next week.

In the meantime, I'm loving the morning light and the idea of Old Man tree getting ready to face the winter.

Corndog Saturday

Last year, I made an effort at frying up some corn dogs and it ended in dismal failure, with corn batter everywhere (though not on the hot dogs).  Determined to succeed in this mission, I never gave up hope.

What you need, it turns out, is a good recipe and a girlfriend who once worked in the competitive world of corn dog cuisine. 

Last night, we got out the fryer and went to work.  I used Pioneer Woman's recipe.

But the technique was all T and Internet, this woman knows her way around a fryer.  She lined up the items for dipping into corn dog batter: hot dogs, little smokies, and cheese sticks.

And fry them she did.

Once you've got the fryer out, you might as well get some waffle fries going.

Waffle fries taste better with cheese sauce.

Suffice it to say that we met our saturated fat dietary requirements last night.  It's a food group in itself, there at the top of the government's food pyramid.

Adult Nirvana

Longtime readers will recall that this blog regularly features postings about my flooded basement.  There was this time.  And this.  And let's not forget this time.  Or perhaps you prefer to read about when it all started?

You get the picture.

After the floods of Hurricane Irene and the follow-up fill of the basement courtesy of Tropical Storm Lee, I began to fantasize about a permanent solution.  The amazing JP, plumber extraordinaire, got to work and now I have a sump pump.  It's quite impressive looking. 

And it spells the end of my illustrious career in basement water removal.

Dogwood Monday: Week 4

Fall has truly taken hold around here, with days in the 60s and nights in the 40s.  It's perfect weather for soup suppers, sleeping with the windows open and morning cups of coffee with a cozy sweater and the company of the dogwood tree in my backyard, which embraced fall this week.

Fall Perfection

We had amazing autumn weather today.  To make it perfect, we made grilled haloumi and apples to eat with our afternoon cocktails.

And baked potato soup for supper.

Lovely.

Generationally Speaking

My parents are in town for the week.  The trip has been planned for a while and as summer transitioned into fall, JT was excited at the prospect of watching playoff baseball with his grandfather.  It was unexpected that the playoff baseball would feature the St. Louis Cardinals, the team JT's grandfather taught him to love.  And love is an understatement.

As of this writing, the Cardinals lead the National League playoff series 3-2.  The last three games were in St. Louis and JT and his grandfather have watched them all.  Last night, I was too exhausted to stay up and watch the last few innings.  So I went upstairs and fell asleep to the sounds of baseball and my son and his grandfather talking about the game and the team that they love.

It doesn't get much better than that.