A few weeks ago, JT and a buddy hatched a last-minute plan to double-date. In New Jersey, you must be 17 to have a driver’s license and so JT’s transportation involved the girl’s mom driving him home to his other mother’s house. There’s been talk of this girl for a few weeks, so none of this was a surprise to me. But as the planning unfolded, I realized I needed to make sure that he had informed girl A and her parents of his family situation: not just that his parents aren’t together, but that his parents are two moms.
On the one hand, JT’s been at our school with me since he was 3 and I’ve always been out, so I suspected that A probably knew and was okay with JT’s family. On the other hand, parents and kids can have different levels of tolerance, and I didn’t want JT to be surprised by how his family was received. Normally, I’d have time to think out this conversation but the last-minute nature of the date and the fact that JT and I both needed to head to class meant that I had to just come out and say what I was thinking. So I did…..”buddy, does A know you have two moms? Do her parents know? Some people might not be okay with that….” I let the notion linger.
He looked at me and then smiled, “Do you think that I would date anyone who wasn’t okay with my family? She knows. Her parents know. They are cool with it.”
That boy of mine is a keeper.