Thursday, December 31, 2009

Aught Not to be Repeated

I have some mixed thoughts about what I'm about to write, but the fact is that I am happy to say goodbye to the aughts...by which I mean the years 2000-2009.  My feelings are mixed because the year 2000 saw the birth of my son; a day that is most surely the finest in my life.  2002 saw me start the job I have now, at a school I find enormously fulfilling, both personally and professionally.  2005 landed me the house I still call home.  On that May day when my family and I received the key, it was my dream house.  Today, if I recall that day's happiness, I feel like a fool.  But the home remains a house that I love, a place that I am enormously grateful to call my home.

The good events from the decade are not small things and on a daily basis I appreciate my blessings.  But in other ways, the aughts were years with some profound disappointments, a feeling that my life and I were broken, and a sadness and heartbreak that I wouldn't care to experience again.  Where I once felt that I led a charmed life, sometime in 2006 that charm broke into a million pieces.  I have yet to pull it together.

On balance, I am happy to welcome a new decade.  Good riddance to bad rubbish and all that.  I wouldn't say that I'm optimistic about the next ten years. But I have a plan.  Earlier this month, I received a small talisman reminding me to "believe in yourself." I plan to keep that reminder at hand in 2010.  And given the last few years of this life of mine, that's a pretty big step.

So here's hoping that 2010 is the start of a better decade.

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