"There's no shame if you need to go to the Quickie Mart and buy tampons, ice cream and chocolate."
"Word of caution: this is gonna be a Carrie at the Prom day. Be prepared."
"Warning: go ahead and find those period underwear at the bottom of your drawer."
"Sure, this is an inconvenience, but it's nothing compared to 7 days of screaming infant."
"Put those white pants away, my friend, those tampon ads lie."
Obviously, this is a less optimistic approach. However, it does offer the advantage of being reality-based.