Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Sign of the Apocalypse

For the big sporting weekend, I stocked up on the sort of nourishment one requires to watch endless hours of basketball: Cherry 7-Up. I grabbed a big bottle off the shelf at Target, brought it home to chill, and then served up a glass on Saturday night.

At which point I realized that it did not taste like the fizzy sweet concoction that I had come to expect. It would seem that the nice people at 7-Up loaded up my soda with anti-oxidants, in a bold attempt to make my tasty non-nutritional soda less non-nutritional. And, sadly, less tasty as well.
Memo to 7-Up: When I want antioxidants, I will eat the fruits and vegetables that naturally provide them. And if I am turning to soda for my antioxidants, then let's be completely honest: I'm screwed.

My friends, this is a sign of the Apocalypse.

3 comments:

Jason said...

"You drink yer soda, Josie - it's got them antioxerdunts, and I ain't givin you no more green tea!"

Nichole said...

It's just a testament to our society. Why eat healthy food when we can just try to make junk food enhanced with vitamins? When Colby got laid off a few years ago, we got food stamps for a few months. This is what the food stamp social worker said to me, and I quote: "With this money you can buy any foods, soda, chips, or whatever." I instead used the rather generous amount of money allotted to us to buy all organic. The only time I could ever afford to do so.

Sharkbuttocks said...

I have one word, whatthefuck?