April Book Report: All You Can Ever Know

One side effect of the staying-at-home lifestyle we all have going on is the amount of time I now have to read. Books are my joy, my relaxation, my comfort, and my near-constant thought.  A good amount of my daydreaming time is spent thinking about what I’ve just read, what I am reading now, and what I will read next.

Among the books that keep coming back to my mind is Nicole Chung’s memoir of adoption, All You Can Ever Know which I read earlier this month.  Chung grew up in rural Oregon, the Korean-American daughter of a white couple.  Much loved as a child, she knew one story of her adoption, a standard story of biological parents unable to look after a child and adoptive parents with much love to share.  The story was a comfort when Chung was a little girl, but as she grew up, she longed for more information.  The longing was as much about her Korean identity as anything else.  It became more central to her sense of self when she was pregnant with her first child.

As she details her search for information about her biological family, she reflects on her on sense of identity as a child and now an adult woman.  She is thinking and writing about herself as a daughter, both adopted and biological, as a mother and, as she will find out, a sister.  As she makes sense of her adoption, it is a story that is personal to her.  But for the reader, the story is also universal, a reflection on love and family, on the stories we know about our identity and the stories we imagine about ourselves.  

The writing is beautiful and Chung’s unfolding of identity and its shifting meaning in a woman’s world is emotional.  I found her story powerful and thoughts about it have echoed in my mind since I finished the book.  To me, that is the very essence of the power of reading.  

Mother Nature Marches On: Your Weekly Dogwood Report - April 29

Today is cloudy and cool and though the birds are chirping, I would still like some sunlight and warmth.  Yesterday was sunny and warm and I spent some time on the back deck.  The dogwood was looking lovely and that was enough to make for a good day.

Tiny House Tuesday - Baltic Sea edition

In 2014, we celebrated my parents 50th wedding anniversary with a family cruise in the Scandinavia and Baltic region.  We visited lots of countries but Talinn, Estonia, stood out for the abundance of well-preserved medieval streets and buildings.  JT and I took a walking tour of the city and saw lots of beauty.  I particularly remember the lovely pastel colors of the buildings and the cobblestone streets and town squares.  At the top of a hill in the older part of the city, we enjoyed an expansive view of city and stepped into a small gift shop with a collection of tiny houses.  JT and I each chose one.

Today, they sit on the bookshelf, pastel reminders of happy day spent noodling around a lovely old city.

That’s happy!

Tree Limbs & Blue Skies

One of the blessings of being home all day is that I have time to step out on the back deck when the sun is high and the sky is blue.  I’ve taken the time to appreciate the sunshine in my backyard and check out the bird life around our feeder.  We have two sets of cardinals that visit us and I caught a picture of one of them high in the branches of Old Man Tree on a sunny day.

On Saturday we had some sunshine and I made time to sit outside.  Even in the chill, it was nice.  Old Man Tree has turned his attention to making leaves and I’m looking forward to being outside more often as the days warm.  I’ll be out on the porch with a book before  before school, I plan lunch on the back deck.  But no matter where I am, Old Man Tree and the blue sky will be my companions.

The Family Iris Patch

This patch of iris bulbs are transplants from my dad’s garden.  His bulbs came from his father’s garden.  My grandfather came by the bulbs by way of his mother-in-law.  For that reason, these plants are  special to me.  I like to think of them growing in Missouri, then California, and now New Jersey.  

For several years, though I got lush green stems, no flowers emerged.  But two years ago, lovely purple irises emerged.  Since then, each April,  I eagerly check the patch for signs of flowers.  Last Sunday, I was rewarded.

Three flowers are preparing to bloom.  I expect that the coming days will bring more.  I will keep watch for all the changes.  That’s happy!

Food Friday: Chicken Supper - Home Cookin’

Early on in the pandemic lock down, there were chicken shortages at our local market,  Chicken is the universal favorite food among the inmates of this house and both JT and T got a little panicky about a poultry shortage.  However, as supplies evened out it became clear that we would be able to fill our freezer with chicken for some chicken suppers.  I am the primary cook and meal planner around here and in this season of anxiousness, I’ve made old favorites as a means of comfort.  We’ve had fried chicken.

And chicken tacos.

Not pictured is chicken noodle soup, cowboy chicken, peanut chicken, and chicken cordon bleu....among other family favorites.  Suffice it to say no one has gone hungry around here.  Family suppers are among the blessings of this crazy period of time.  I've been one to take them for granted and it's been nice to have this daily blessing.

Front Yard Tulips

 This patch of yellow tulips with red markings blooms in the front yard.  

One of the advantages of my work-from-home arrangements is that I can spy the tulips all day long through the windows in my study.  I’m enjoying the blooms very much from this vantage point.  That’s happy!

Mother Nature Marches On: Your Weekly Dogwood Report - April 22

Spring has been its usual moody combination around here with days of sunshine and warmth followed by days of clouds and storms.  Today is beautifully clear sunshine but cold and windy because Spring makes her own rules.

Day by day, the warmth and light are showing the dogwood a path forward.  It’s a path of pretty flowers followed by fresh green leaves.  That’s happy!

Tiny House Tuesdays: Little Green House

The little brown clay house lives in the dining room but the rest of my tiny house collection makes its home in the living room, on my book shelf.

This book shelf is one of the happiest corners of Sassafras House because books are that way for me.  This shelf has a collection of treasures; the books here have all been read at least once and have been saved because they are worth a re-read.  Over the years, I’ve added tiny decorations to the shelves.  Tucked among the books, they seem like hidden treasures to me.  Among the treasures is this wooden green house.

Of all the houses in my collection, I’ve owned this one the longest.  I bought it in my hometown when I was in college at UCLA so it is more than 30 years old. 

This kind of Cape Cod saltbox style house was not common in my corner of California.  But here in New Jersey, they are everywhere.  The style is appeals to me know at least as much as it did in the late 1980s when I first acquired it.   These days, it seems less exotic than it did at the time.  Life is that way, I suppose.

Of Silver Linings......

My school has a dress code and as one of the people most often responsible for enforcing it, I feel an obligation to follow it in the first place.  As a consequence,  some of my clothing choices are dictated by the terms of the dress code.

Blue jeans are not permitted but denim skirts fall into a nebulous category.  When I worked in the Upper School, they were permitted.  But in the Middle School, some teachers believe they aren’t allowed.

Now is where I admit that while I don’t care for blue jeans, I love me a denim skirt.  I have several and they are the first thing I reach for when Spring weather seems anywhere near warm enough to warrant it.  But I am wary of wearing them at school (though I will note that the dress code currently makes no mention of them, ahem….) and though I could go an entire week in denim skirts, I confine myself to wearing one every few weeks.  

But working from home means the dress code is out the door.  And a few weeks back, I declared it to be denim skirt week.  This week is looking to repeat that theme.

Denim skirts and flip flops are my work from home dress code and you better believe that I am Ms. Compliance.  Let’s call this a silver denim lining of stay-at-home orders.

Front Yard Flowerbed Clean Up

I spent most of Spring Break avoiding a clean out of this flowerbed.  In normal times, I see it every day and the mess would have guilted me into it.

But pandemics and being housebound are not normal and so this flowerbed was easy to avoid.  The mess grew more burdensome as the days passed.

Today, I declared that enough was enough.  In the sunlight and warmth, I decided to get after the chore.  For starters, I knew I would be glad that I had done so.  And though I no longer pull out o this driveway each day, there is no reason I can’t step outside  and admire the flowerbed.  After all, it is at its most beautiful as April yields to the month of May.

A cleanup, which involved pulling off the remains of last year’s hosta blooms and trimming back the multiple shoots of volunteer rose-of-Sharon shoots, was over due.  The work now done, I’ve given the azaleas a shot at pretty flowers.

When the job was finished I took the time to peek over the porch railing and admire my work.

Moving forward, I still have need to clear out the dying evergreen bush on the edge of the bed.  But a daily peek at this flowerbed will bring me a reminder that Mother Nature is at her most lovely in Spring.  A beautiful Spring is a reward unto itself.  And, at a time like this, when worry and anxiety can easily carry the day, Mother Nature’s beauty is the best sort of remedy.

In Praise of Sleeping In

During my regular work days, I get up at 5:30 am and do some school work at home before I finish getting ready and leave the house for school.  I aim to leave the driveway at 7:15 and, for the most part I do.  The need to get up at 5:30 is to give me the chance to spend some time in the quiet of the morning before the chaos of school.

Now that the chaos of school with kids is on temporary hiatus, my morning routine is a much gentler affair.  Instead of a 5:30 am wake up, I get up at 7, shower and dress, and then head downstairs to get a cup of coffee and start my day.  

I miss the chaos and energy of time spent in the company of middle schoolers.  But it is an undeniable fact that the days land gentler when school is remote.  In my study, I teach my classes and then afterward I get things done with nary an interruption.  

Don’t get me wrong - I prefer school in a classroom together with my students..  But there are small advantages to my current days and it feels like we might get to May without the exhaustion that school in May usually bring.  I know for sure that the extra sleep has been a most happy development.  And these days, happy is good.  So I’ll embrace it and be glad for small blessings.

Mother Nature Marches On: Your Weekly Dogwood Report - April 15

My backyard dogwood tree is just outside the kitchen pantry window and it’s a welcome sight each morning.  In the backyard, the tree itself is in the shadow of Old Man Tree, the giant red oak tree that is just off the back deck.  Even in the shadows of that noble old tree, the white flowers of the dogwood stand out.

The blooming season is here and in this morning’s sunlight the dogwood is standing tall.

For the next few weeks, as flowers and young leaves emerge, I will post a picture of the dogwood on Wednesday.  It’s a reminder that Spring and Mother Nature march on, even as we stay home under the shelter and shade of the dogwood.

Tiny House Tuesday: Brown Ceramic House

Being at home has reminded me to appreciate the little knick knacks and collections that make my house a home.  I have several collections of this sort and for the next few Tuesdays I plan to write about one of them: my tiny house collection.  All told, I have 6 small houses and though it’s not a large collection (in terms of numbers or size), I’ve had some of these houses for years and the collection always makes me smile.  Most of the houses live on the bookshelf in the living room but today’s house is safely tucked in a spot in the dining room.   

This house was made by an artist who taught at my school, Frances Mackey.  She gave it to me when she noticed that 4 year old JT liked to have small items in his pockets.  He carried it home in his pocket that day and then we put it in a safe spot.  These days, it lives between a couple of brown clay squirrels, next to a ceramics project that JT made in kindergarten.  That project is flat and has the imprint of a leaf on it and is known as “pizza rock” because that’s where we tuck money for pizza delivery.  The little brown house is charming and tucked among other beloved items, it always makes me smile.

Peach Blossoms and Sunshine

Though it’s stormy today, much of the last few weeks has brought enough sunshine and warmth to get my backyard peach tree blooming.  Every year is the same.  The peach tree gets a lot of sunlight and moves toward blooms sooner than most of the plants in the yard.  Even so, things start off slow.

Then one morning I look outside and there are pink flowers on all the branches.  This tree, and its showy pink flowers, are one of the nicest parts of early Spring.

Seen against the vibrant blue sky, the pink is simply splendid, some of Mother Nature’s nicest work.  That’s happy!

Easter

Easter is my most favorite cooking holiday and pandemic or not, I was ready.  

There was ham, mac & cheese, potato casserole, Spring salad, hot rolls, deviled eggs, and bread & butter pickles.  For dessert, I made lemon cakelets in the shape of bunnies. 

We had a delicious supper and ate with the windows open so that we could hear the birds chirping.  All the leftovers fit in the fridge for a second meal later this week.  Last year, JT wasn’t home for Easter and I missed him.  This year, circumstances being what they are, he is home. We are well and very aware of all the blessings in our lives.  This year, that feels like an abundance  and I can't help but think that there is a lesson in that reality.  Happy Easter, y'all!

Front Porch in April

Usually, I set out each month’s porch decorations right on the 1st pf the month.  But this month, between the cold weather and my stay-at-home status, I was a little late getting my act together.  The bunny flag and Easter egg wreath stayed out because I love them.  

The table got an Easter basket and Easter florals.

I’m trying not to lose sight of my cherished habits in the new normal that is staying at home.  I know being home won’t last forever and it’s easier to manage if I combine it with some of my happiest habits.  So the front porch is cheery, even if we rarely leave the house to see it.

Report from the Homefront: Work from Home Rookie edition

The first few days of shelter in place expectations found me on Spring Break and, in theory, I was on vacation.  But it was already abundantly clear that we would not be returning to regular classes on March 30 and so I was working every day, in my usual dual capacity, as both a 7th grade history teacher and a school administrator.  Sorting out the logistics of teaching my classes from home and helping to make plans for the rest of the school to run remotely meant busy days.

Despite the work that clearly needed doing, I was in need of a break. So I decided that I would fully embrace the work from home advantage and spend my days in my pajamas.

Take that, pandemic!

By day 3, I was morose and filled with despair.  It became abundantly clear that while I had no choice but to be the-work-from-home-type, I was not the work-from-home-in-your pajamas type.  T, who has worked from home for more than 5 years and has the pajama collection to prove it, made the diagnosis: working from home in your nightgown is not for you, she suggested, while backing away from my piteous glare.

That was during the first week of this nonsense.  Here at the end of week 4, I’ve recognized how much I like routines and so I’ve made new ones to reflect current stay-at-home conditions.  During the weekdays, I set an alarm for 7 am, shower, get dressed in actual clothes (though not shoes), and then come downstairs to get to work in my study.  I take a break to eat breakfast, style my hair, and brush my teeth before classes begin.  Basically, I’ve inserted routines into my home life, where I hadn’t needed them before.  

Happily, though I sometimes feel the jitters of being housebound, I love Sassafras House.  I enjoy working in my brightly lit and newly well-organized study.  Spring and our growing ability to be outside certainly helps.  Being aware of my multiple blessings helps even more.  I may not be able to work in pajamas but my flip flop collection is really earning its keep.  And that’s happy!

The Backyard Cardinal

For several years now, we’ve had  pair of cardinals who visit our bird feeder, rest in the backyard, and sometimes chirp in the windows to torture the cats.  

We love all of it and were especially delighted a few weeks back when a new cardinal turned up.  He’s a loner and small enough to be young and so we’ve named him the Bachelor Cardinal.  Earlier this week, he sat high on the branch above me as I soaked up the sun and the brilliant blue sky.

I love my backyard and the wildlife it contains and as week four of staying home settles around me, views like this are a balm on my worries.

Have a Cuppa

Quality office supplies are my sweet spot and, because I am a teacher, stickers count as quality office supplies.  I use stickers to decorate class notes, my folders, my calendar, make bookmarks……pretty much everything is more happy with a sticker.

And I am a sticker snob so when I saw this shop on Etsy  I was best pleased.  With good cause, I think.  These little tea cups make everything nicer.

My clipboard is filled with lists of work to be done.  But that tea cup makes it all better.

Report from the Homefront: Searching for Grace

I had a lot of plans for Spring Break, most of which involved some time away from school and schoolwork.  Then, on March 12, the world turned upside down and so did my plans.  I spent most of Spring Break alternately fretting about the pandemic and planning to teach remotely.  Most days I did both at the same time.  

I was in front of the computer for hours and a little too prone to refreshing news feeds so that by the end of week one, having failed to pace my worries, I was close too overwhelmed.  It didn’t help that I’d gone into the Break at full speed, knowing that a break was ahead.

I was ready for some at-home time though I wasn’t quite ready for the only-at-home time that the month of March delivered.  Daily, I thought about things to write for my blog.  My digital journal is littered with more than a half-dozen half finished posts.  The truth is that I spent so much time in front of my screen planning lessons for school that when the work was done, I retreated to the sofa with a good book.  Day by day, I fell behind.

The more time that passed, the easier it became to dodge this blog.  Plus, it was easier to post on Instagram.  But this blog has seen me through many of life’s anxieties and it seems short-sighted to tap out now, when I know that a few years from now, I will welcome every record of this time.

So today I am renewing my commitment to post writings to this blog.  In the coming days, I will fill in the details of the time since my last post, on March 23.  And I will remind myself, daily, to look for the grace that can be found when I pause and look for it.

Front Yard Flowerbed in April

I was reluctant to start this post because I spent most of Spring Break thinking I should get after the task of cleaning up this flowerbed.  For starters, a clean up was long overdue.

I had the two weeks of Spring Break to get after it but didn’t largely because I was feeling overwhelmed.  Though I know the best remedy for these feelings is t simply get after the task, still I delayed.

The good news is that the cleanup will pay off.  April is a month of glorious change in this patch of soil and the clean up will pay off.