Sunday, May 12, 2013

Lucky Number 13

I tell everyone who will listen that on his first Mother's Day, JT outdid himself for a lifetime of Mothers' Days by laughing for the first time.  If I could have any gift on this day, it would be to relive that moment when my nearly 3 month old baby belly-laughed for the first time.

More laughter would be quite welcome these days.  My 13th year of motherhood has been rather a rough go, with adolescence in full-swing.  Long ago I learned to roll with the punches of a changing child but knowing that this too will pass isn't always comfort enough.  I always joke that I have two lists of worries:  the things I know I should worry about and the things it doesn't occur to me to worry about, but that I should also worry about.  7th grade has been proof of that theory.  

In the end, I think that is the real challenge of motherhood: understanding that uncertainty is the only certainty.  From infancy to toddlerhood and then adolescence, each year is a different parenting challenge.  This last one, with its roller coaster emotions, has been a reminder to me that even as a child seeks independence, the unwavering love of a mama is more-needed than ever.

So every day I take a moment to remind my boy that I love him with all of my heart and that I feel unbelievably lucky to have him in my world.  No matter how difficult the day has been, those facts are always true.



No comments: