This past week was the first week of school for both JT and me. We're back into a routine of homework, setting out school clothes, early mornings, and packing lunch boxes. I love my job, so I'm always happy to return. JT (mostly) tolerates school. Sometimes he even likes it. But no matter how glad we are to get back into the swing of things, transitions are always rough for the two of us.
This year, my ex has insisted that JT use her last name again. Though I question the wisdom of her enthusiasm for making an ass of herself at JT's school (a place where I work and am therefore well-known and perhaps well-liked), I lacked the will to fight on this front. Instead of just being JT Sassafras, he's JT Broken Promises-Sassafras. Back to school, with its inevitable "describe your family" assignments, always features a certain amount of emotional minefields for JT. Her insistence on this change just added to the list. And I wasn't quite prepared to be looking for JT's name on an alphabetical list in a different spot than usual.
But we're coping. When he writes his name, he's still JT Sassafras. On the transition front, I've taken some care to avoid overloading either of us with chores or obligations, to make sure we get enough sleep, and to remind myself not to be overly sensitive. We've even shared a laugh or two. I know that we'll be settled in to our school schedule within a few weeks and that this transitional anxiety will then exit our lives. Until then, I just repeat to myself that I can't rush time and that it will all be okay.
And mostly, it will all be okay.