Lisa introduced me to the idea that you should make a wish when the clock read 11:11 or 2:22 or 5:55.....you get the idea. Since we moved into this house last year, when the clock has been prepared to grant my wish, I really haven't had anything to wish for. I had a healthy, happy child, a loving relationship, and we were living in our dream home. So the discovery of a 3:33 moment would give me a happy pause to reflect on how good my life was.
But suddenly I have found that the loving relationship was a figment of my imagination. My partner is gone; and seems to be happily engaged in her new life while JT and I catch our breath and try to cope with our sadness. Today, on the way to the grocery store, I saw that the clock read 2:22. Time to make a wish, I thought. But what to wish for? The list is suddenly long: a break from the pain? room for new happiness? healing? the power to forgive Lisa? someone new to love? The list ran on and on. I settled on peace and the grace to manage each day.
But it just seems so sad to suddenly have such a long list of wishes.
3 comments:
The wish you "settled" on has already come true; you have handled everything up to this point with incredible grace. While the list may appear long, the patience and love you and JT have will work wonders on its length.
Your choice of wish was good -- it's hard to continue. And eventually, hopefully your wish will be to forgive -- not for her, but for you and your son and your future.
Peace.
Thanks for the good wishes. I keep coming back to read your comments when I need an extra does of strength.
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